Alyssa's Final Journal Entry

Christmas is almost here. Today is the Solstice. I don’t know, folks. Something doesn’t feel right here. I…

Let me tell you. I’ve never owned one of those little village things. You know, the fake snow all around and little green trees and fake homes and/or business establishments named after characters from Dickens and you stack them all around so it looks like some sort of festive place you’ve never been. I always want to know what’s going on in the houses. They always have second floors and I always want to see (or be) in there. I don’t know why. Oh, whenever they have sled or ski runs with multiple levels, I always want to go down them. There was one called “Log Cabin” that was meant to be someone’s home. (I stayed at a log cabin once for three weeks. I’m sure it was very interesting.) I like the “Log Cabin” because there’s a little lake out front with a tiny boat in it. But, the scale of the boat is wrong. It’s about a 1/4 the size of the water, which would make it ridiculous to have. Several good rows and you’d be on the other side. In fact, the man is such that he could probably leap across it or at least bounce once in the middle and go from there. I love these things.

A memory that is leaving me... Being in a knicknackeria in a cold town. A wall cabinet nook...three stories of these things. It’s laid down with white cloth and flows from the first level to the very top. Shops on the bottom leading to the banquet halls and festive homes in the middle flowing to the ski lofts, sled runs and frozen ponds for skating up top. It’s breathtaking. A miniature breathtaking. I stare at it for a very long time. It’s glorious. I’d love to be there. But, I never will. This I know and understand.

But, that doesn’t mean I don’t want it very, very bad.

I’m restless and I feel detached. I haven’t stood on top of my trailer and taken the air for weeks.

I don’t know. I thought maybe this would help me out. Blogging on. The first few times it felt great. But, it doesn’t do a damn thing anymore. I’m going to wrap it up. See you around. Merry…