Friday, February 24, 2006

MC Hammer to Play Free Concert On Top of My Trailer Home!

Free Tonight! At My Trailer!

MC Hammer! It will be "his prerogative" to play a concert for you!

Show starts at 8PM.

Free refreshments! Just knock on my trailer door and I will answer.

If no one answers, yell for Wally! I'll come a'runnin'!

After the show, I'll be setting out my collection of lawn chairs and we can sit down and talk for a while. I've been really cleaning up the place nice so I think you should have a good time.

Maybe you could come over again tomorrow night? Whitney might be here...

I can't wait to see you. Bring a friend. Please?

Monday, February 20, 2006

We Apologize

for the infrequent number of posts over the last week.

Things have been going very strangely here in Turbot.

We'll get back to you soon.

Read CRACKED.

Monday, February 13, 2006

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Thursday, February 09, 2006

GREY'S PREPARED BEEF PLANT HAS BEEN SOLD!

More news as it comes in. But, we were told today that Mr. Grey and Family have accepted an offer for the purchase of the plant.

We've not been told who the purchaser is our what the future of the plant is but we've got out fingers crossed.

Until then, we will try to continue "business as usual" here at the blog. We've got some real wisecrackers comin' up. Stay tuned!

- Marlene & Arthur

Sunday, February 05, 2006

Super Bowl Fun-Day

Well, everyone, it’s a Red Letter Day in Turbot. Because we are going to have a Super Bowl Party!!!!

Oh boy!!!

I’m not much of a fan myself but, come on, aren’t those commercials great? I wish they’d cancel the game and just show those commercials. They never let you down.

Arthur’s anxious because he’s a big fan of Pittsburgh so the trailer is on edge. “They’d better win, Marlene!” He tells me with that tone. What a goofball! In fact, the first of the guests are arriving (mostly folks from our floors at Grey’s) right now. I’m waving “Hello!” to them as you read this. We are going to have a great time.

Pizza, check. Beer and pop, check. Nachos, check. Assorted veggie platter, no way! This ain’t any Figure Skating Party! (By the way, have you been watching Skating with Celebrities? We love it.) And, when the fourth quarter hits…Beef Jerky and Banana Splits! This will be the best party yet!

What about next year’s, you say? Who knows? Who knows?

Uh-oh! I hear Arthur arguing with Berns and his wife. Already! Did the game start? These sports rivalries are so exciting when you know what’s going on!

All right, everyone! Enjoy the game! I’ll talk to you soon.

P.S. If YOU are reading this (you know who YOU are), forget about it. You can’t come. Arthur does own a bat and his temper can flare. Coppish?

Friday, February 03, 2006

Alyssa's Final Journal Entry

Hello.

Alyssa here.

Sorry. It’s been a while. I imagine you've all read about what went on over Christmas. Tim and I are very sorry for any trouble we may have caused. We actually thought we’d be back sooner than we were. There was a mishap. Unfortunately, I can’t really go into it.

I’m here today to say good-bye. Good-bye to Turbot. Good-bye to Grey’s Prepared Beef. Good-bye to Alyssa’s Journal. Don’t worry. I’m not getting morbid on you. Every thing I was complaining about in the past year is gone. Everything that was dragging me down and taking the energy from me is unimportant nonsense. I’m gone.

I have sold my trailer. I got a decent price for it. I’m going to use the money and travel because I can no longer remain in the town of Turbot. It is falling apart. Grey’s is being sold. I’m sure you all know that. Who is it going to? Who is taking the reins of the town’s only business? I’ve no idea. But, this area isn’t so great for keeping businesses open once they get sold off. And, frankly, I don’t really want to move to Guam. Although, I may visit.

The whole feeling of this town is just plummeting. That feeling that I used to have of being lost is everywhere now. I see it in every face. I’ve given my two weeks. The new tenants move in when my time underground ends. I’ve sold them most of my things. I’m keeping a backpack full of things. I plan on collecting as I go along. I feel free.

I wish I could tell you what happened to me over the holiday. My eyes opened up. I saw past the beef and the petty backstabbing. I realized that working several stories underground is awful. I learned and saw what this town was like at the beginning. It would put you to shame to see what we’ve done to this beautiful place. Grey and his Prepared Beef can drop into the center of the earth as far as I’m concerned.

My hands are shaking as I write this. The things Tim and I did and saw. (No, none of it was sexual. (I feel gross even having to mention it but I know what many of you think. I don’t want to be in this gutter anymore.) My bridges aren’t just burning. I’ve destroyed them. If I fail, I fail knowing that I’ve done what I wanted to do. Have you ever seen Grey and his family? Mole People come alive. He cares about his family and nothing else. He would seal us all underground if it made him a decent profit. Maybe that’s the American Way but I think it sucks. I’ve seen more. I’ve seen better. People deserve better. Every single one. Not just a few lucky folks sitting up top. That’s garbage.

Good-bye everyone. Maybe I’ll start my own blog. Keep an eye out. Live a good life.